Sunday, July 31, 2011

July 31: Cam Newton

Today brings the prettiest of all the Underwear ProBowl recruits, Cameron "Cam" Newton, QB and first overall pick by the Carolina Panthers in the 2011 Draft. I saved this gorgeous specimen for Sunday because a creation this beautiful is nothing less than a gift from God. At the ripe young age of 22, this is one cradle I would be happy to rob.

Speaking of ripe, Georgia should really reconsider being nicknamed the "Peach State" because Mr. Newton is clearly the best and most succulent thing to ever be homegrown there. The smooth skin, the pearly white teeth, the perfect smile...this peach is worthy of a blue ribbon prize! And Cecil Newton, if you're reading this,  I don't care what the price tag is... I'm willing to take out a loan for any "pay-for-play" scheme you can offer to get young Mr. Newton on my team! He's priceless... pure priceless.

I'm hoping this season brings my Cam much success to start his NFL career, but I'm also hoping he takes a cue from fellow Underwear Pro Bowler, Adam Vinatieri, and does some post-game interviews in his tights because I was greatly disappointed by the lack of shirtless photos available. I have a nice camera... I can help you out if you need it, Cam. xoxo

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